Directions in Life

Why don't men like to ask for directions? I've been pondering this question and have a few thoughts:
Driving to a destination, like hunting, is a non-verbal task. It involves the optic, aural and tactile senses as well as spatial skills, directional sense and instinct. Asking for directions involves taking a non-verbal art and trying to express it in words. Men are greatly suspicious about these types of things and doubtful about acts where much is lost in the translation. First they have to express in words the idea of where they are going. This is more than just an address. We have already processed that address as an image in our minds based on our understanding of maps and locations. Then we have to take the verbal instructions, often unclear, often from other men equally hesitant of this activity, and re-edit our mental concept of the destination in relation to where we are. Driving around searching for clues and landmarks when lost is part of the hunting process. We would rather try to figure it out for ourselves rather than open the back of the book and look at the answer. It adds to the sense of accomplishment when the destination is reached. This is also part of the reason men are so interested in how long it took to drive somewhere. Not only does it show they can drive fast but that they didn't get lost along the way.
Isn't there an old joke about someone hesitant to ask for directions, "How does he know where I'm going?" This is another key to the answer. Why should we trust someone whom we've never met before to be knowledgeable of how to get from here to some place they've probably never been? Why does the ability to operate a cash register at a gas station make someone Rand McNally? My experience has also shown the confidence with which someone gives directions is inversely proportional to the accuracy of those directions. Several times after someone has asked me how to get somewhere I realized moments after they left that I should have said "left" instead of "right" or "three stoplights" instead "two". Better to consult McNally himself.

Geek Test

Are you a Geek? Take the Geek Test here. I scored a 17.15976% which classifies me as a Geek (seems like a low score to me), but this is also the second lowest classification on the Geek Scale.
Thank God I don't own any 10 sided dice.

Good Design, Bad Design

I love good design. When products are created with the person who will use them on a daily basis in mind it makes me feel good. Few things piss me off more than design that is so idiotic I want to through the damned thing away.
Good Design:
Here is an amazing showerhead. Where I live there is very low water pressure and showering used to be like a Chinese water toture test. Then I decided to buy a new showerhead to see if my daily wash could be improved. What caught my attention in the store was this Moen's Revolution Massaging Showerhead.

Only one dial to turn to make all the adjustments, this shower head made my trickle of water shoot. Enough pressure to wake me up in the morning, great wide spray setting, easy to clean and just looks cool, I love this showerhead.
Bad Design:
Since I don't eat a lot of toast, I own a cheap toaster. I think I bought mine, the Proctor Silex Smart Toaster, at WalMart a few years ago. It works well enough as far as toast goes but it has one major design flaw. The power cord comes out the front. Plus it is a really short cord so you almost have to turn the thing around just to plug it in, thus making it difficult to push down your toast and adjust the settings.

Maybe I should save up for a Dualit.

Things Learned or Remembered While Fly Fishing

Oh Where Oh Where

My cell phone often goes missing for days like a roaming housecat. I'll lose it for a few days and then it will turn up, battery dead in a place I should have noticed much earlier. It is small enough to fit into my pocket but also small enough to remain hidden under everyday things. It is a good thing though when it turns up again and I haven't missed any calls on it. At least that number is still safe from the marketers.

Ginger Ice Cream

I just added my recipe for ginger ice cream. Hope you enjoy.

Happy Birthday Balzac

Today is the birthday of Honoré de Balzac, one of the greatest writers who has ever lived.

SPAM SPAM SPAM

I am inundated by people sending me things I don't want. This does not only apply to email of which I get probably 100 SPAM messages a day. My postal mail is full of credit card offers, catalogs I never requested and will never order from, important information I won't ever have time to read and coupons for things I don't buy. Ninety percent or more of phone calls to my house are from people wanting to sell me things I don't want or need or offers for vacation or travel packages in places I never go. I screen all my calls with caller ID and never pick up the phone if it's someone I don't know. Coming home at the end of a long day I typically have 5 or 6 messages on my answering machine. Many are just dead air. Some are my least favorite phone messages, prerecorded where the person is affecting to sound natural and unrehearsed . "Oh...gosh...(slight chuckle) I'm sorry I missed you. I had some really interesting offers today which I'm sure you would have been interested in. Hmm, well, if you call me back today at 800-555-1212 before five o'clock I can keep the offer open. We don't do this for everyone but you have been such a good customer I'm willing to extend it just for you." So much of my day is spent listening to and reading things foisted on me by the free marketplace. Even if I don't pay attention to it I still have to spend time cleaning it up. At the end of each month I take a full 40 lb. trash bag of unwanted, unread mail to the trash/recycling center much of which can't be recycled ("No Envelopes" says the sign above Paper Recycling). This scatter shot, untargeted advertising is cheap in all its forms (paper, phone, email) so we are caught in its deluge. I blame much of this on Marketers.
The promise of Marketers has always been that by collecting information about customers, businesses can improve products based on what people want. What they deliver however is information to businesses about how to change the message of flawed products so that people will buy them despite their shortcomings. And with information becoming an asset and customer databases big money, many Marketers will just try to sell their data (our names, addresses and phone numbers) to anyone who will buy it. Rather than finding clients who can best make use of their databases and target their products to customers who really want them and have the means to buy, they often spin the usefulness of the data, changing labels slightly to "rebrand" one data set for a new industry. What's the result? A full mailbox and answering machine with unwanted solicitations.

"Like Beckham Bent It" or "My Sister's Big Fat Sikh Wedding"

I had heard a lot of praise for Bend It Like Beckham the latest English heart-warmer of a movie so I was quite hopeful upon the dimming of the theatre lights. The film certainly has heart and a true love of its characters. For those who don't know "Bend It Like Beckham" is about a young Indian woman in England who loves to play soccer. Her older sister is about to get married and her parents feel she is at the age she should be giving up youthful endeavors like sport and concentrate on education and marriage. Will she overcome her parents’ objections? Will she get to play in an end of season game that could decide her future? Will she get the outsider boy who supports her through the difficult times? Oh come on. Of course she will. And if you think I'm giving anything away you probably thought My Big Fat Greek Wedding was a refreshing original comedy.
"Bend It" certainly has more heart than "Big Fat". I certainly cared more about Bend It's characters who although many were stereotypes at least weren't caricatures of stereotypes. You know where the movie is going but it's a fun ride getting there ().
Also for those who don't know the Beckham of the title is David Beckham the most famous athlete in the world today (outside of the US) and husband of Posh Spice. As for "bend it" see Roger Ebert's explanation here at the bottom of his column.

What is the Matrix?

That is Unacceptable

I went to the movies last night and reloaded the Matrix. All shows were sold out but a friend had an extra ticket bought online. When we got there about an hour before show time the crowd was divided up into groups for the two different 8:00 showings. After a little while apparently a manager told some people they were standing in the wrong line and the line for their theatre was across the lobby. One couple got very upset. "We got here early to get good seats and the ticket person told us to stand here. Now you tell us we are in the wrong line! That is unacceptable!" But the couple stood in the line, shorter than the first, and when all were allowed to be seated they got some of the best seats.
It just made me think about what people say is unacceptable (war, hunger, violence, badly funded schools, bad customer service) and what they actually do about it. Most people accept the line they are told to stand in and at most will just complain to other people about having to do so. Whether they go any further will usually depend on how much discomfort they personally have to endure as a result. But most people do nothing else.
It also seemed odd that while more important things like war and bad schools are far more "unacceptable" many people will be more outraged by not getting a good seat at the movies than by things more serious. Even then in the case of being told to stand in the wrong line, the customer and their $8.00 movie ticket was really trying to pull a power trip over a theatre manger who was probably paid little over $8.00 an hour and was handling the situation as best she could, correcting the error of the $5.00 an hour ticket taker.
I mention this merely as observation not harsh criticism, fully aware of my own acceptance of unacceptable things.

No, That's Not My Writing

Someone asked me if I hand wrote all the titles on my site. Well no, no one asked me but I am anticipating the questions I know you are dying to know and I'd better get started on my FAQ section now. That is not my writing. It is a good thing. My writing can be neat when it has to but usually isn't. Plus the fact that I hardly hand write anything anymore other than my signature. Most of the lettering on my site is an old font called Flood I bought a while back for a project. I always liked it and wanted to use it in the design of my site. So I did. Typically I don't buy fonts but I had this one around. I would buy more fonts if they were so frickin expensive. I've seen some really nice hand-lettered comic book fonts I admired but they were in the hundreds of dollars. Too rich for my blood.

Mutant Folk

I finally saw X2 on Friday night. Even though I never followed Marvel comics very regularly I still enjoyed the first one and this sequel as well. It does a great job of moving the story along and giving equal time to the entire stable of young superheroes. There were a couple of shots (the wide angle of Jean Grey in the foreground and other X-Men in back at camp, the low angle under-the-table shot of Mystique) that were really fresh. And the theme of an overly fearful government, quick to take military action against the wrong enemy is quite appropriate for our times, and I'm sure many times to come. The first of the summer fun movies. ()

Three weeks after its nationwide release A Mighty Wind finally came to my bustling metropolis. This is the latest film from Christopher Guest and Eugene Levy in their freeform style of Waiting for Guffman and Best in Show. Most of the cast is familiar from the earlier movies and do a superb job in their new roles. Although it wasn't as consistently funny as either of Guest's other films it has enough moments of spontaneous laughter to make it worth seeing. Perhaps what keeps it from rising to the level of the other movies is the subject matter, a folk singing reunion concert on live TV. Although that is good for a chuckle it would be hard for it to inspire biting satire at the expense of such warm hearted cumbyah-singing peaceniks so it avoids doing so. The big laughs come from supporting characters playing over-the-top agents and PR promoters. Fans of the earlier Guest/Levy movies will enjoy A Mighty Wind ().

Photo Shoot IV Added

I just added the pictures I took this weekend in my 4th and final Photo Shoot for my Studio Lighting class. We tried a few things with Christmas lights and long exposures to create some cool effects in the background. Carol was just the best model. It really isn't easy and she did it so well.


It was a great class. I learned an enormous amount.

Mrs. Robinson Stays Home and Reads a Book

There are often times in the morning as I'm getting ready for work when I'll turn on the TV, not to the Today Show or Regis and Kelly as I most often do, but to see what movies are on one of the movie channels. Every now and then there will be a surprise. This morning one of my favorite little quirky movies was on, "84 Charing Cross Road".
The movie tells the story of Helene Hanff, a Brooklyn scriptwriter, and Frank P. Doel, a London bookseller, and their decades long relationship only through letters. It's a story about books and letters and the kindness of strangers in far away places. The cast is great with Anne Bancroft and Anthony Hopkins as the two main correspondents but also Judi Dench and Merecedes Ruehl and a great supporting cast.
Epistolary novels, stories written in the form of letters, may be some of the most difficult to make into movies. "Dangerous Liaisons" was pretty good as was "The Color Purple" but those stories had lots of sex and intrigue. "84 Charing Cross Road" just has books and small moments in people's short lives. After seeing the movie the first time years ago in college I read the book and it wasn't as vibrant as the film that subtly portrays the humor and heart of its characters. If you haven't seen "84 Charing Cross Road" and you love books, I hope you will enjoy it.

Evolutionary Theory

I just read Megan's new theory on jumpingmonkeys.com and after digging in the garden for two days I came up with an evolutionary theory of my own. I propose the early humans did not begin the cultivation of plants as a food source for themselves but as a means of attracting deer and rabbits and gophers that they could kill and eat.
Now I'm no anthropologist or apologist for ants but having seen the bulk of many a backyard garden eaten up by deer and varmints I think my theory has some credibility. Would you rather try to herd a large mammal off a cliff so she falls to her death or just attract her close to your home where you can jump out of a tree and fix her up for breakfast?
I just know the deer are already staking out our plot of land at night, dreaming of the buffet we will provide (what? no olives?). But I have no plans to make venison stew any time soon. Just gotta be on guard against those waskely wabbits.

Almost Enough to Make You Cry

Have you seen the price of onions lately? Whether they're big yellow onions or old world white onion or the fancy Vidalias they cost over a buck a pound and since each one weighs a pound that comes to one dollar an onion. Unbelievable. Sure the small yellow onions in the netted bag are a little cheaper but for most cooking I prefer the white. That may change though with the price of them. The onion tart I made this weekend used 6 big onions and they were almost $6. And the one-time exotic Vidalia onions were the same price as the others, expensive. (A woman once corrected my pronunciation of Vuh-DALE-ya saying I must not be from the South 'cause everyone here pronounces it VI-dale-ya. I almost answered that she must not be from the Midwest because no one there would correct a person so rudely.) Someone just wrote me that you should never cook with Vidalia onions. I've heard this before, that it destroys what's unique about them. Well if they cost as much as white onions and I need to carmelize them I will use Vidalias. I've made my onion tart dozens of time before and this recipe works. So there.

So aside from my potted herbs on my deck I am going to team up with my friend Ray this year and plant a garden. There will definitely be onions. I'm also interested in planting some English peas which I've been craving lately. Maybe some leaks too if the soil is sandy enough.

The other thing I was curious about planting was wasabi. I never see fresh wasabi in the stores, even most Asian markets. After a quick Internet search I found contradictory information about how difficult it is to grow. In Japan it traditionally grows along sandy streams. Some people say it is difficult to grow because of it requires consistently moist soil. Other people say it isn't that hard at all. But then some of them are selling the plants at $7.50 a pop. Well I'm willing to try. Let you know how it turned out.

Two New Recipes Posted

Today was the birthday of Ray one of my best friends. I cook a lot with Ray and his family and Ray's favorite dish that I make is my German onion tart, Zwiebelkuchen. I made one for him today. It is one of my favorites too.
The other recipe is one I created about a year ago around the birthday of my friend Amanda. It's a basic cheesecake but with Tazo Chai tea added to it. It tastes a lot like a Chai Latte. I call it Amanda's Tazo Chai Cheesecake. In this recipe I use the Tazo Chai concetrate that is available at Starbuck's. This is different from the Tazo Chai which is just the tea itself. The concentrate has sugar and cinnamon and vanilla.
If you make any of my recipes let me know how they turn out.

2 Links That Made Me Smile Today

1) My favorite song by They Might Be Giants is "Doctor Worm". I hadn't heard it for a while and wasn't sure if I was remembering the lyrics right so I listened to it again today. When they got to the line "I'll leave the front unlocked 'cause I can't hear the doorbell" I just cracked up. That's how it is. I can't ever hear someone at the door. You can listen to the song here.

2) Check out this Honda commercial. One of the most amazing things I've ever seen. And I drive a Honda too for what it's worth.
I got the link from Morgan Webb's blog which is always fun. I learned about Morgan's site from Megan Morrone's JumpingMonkeys.com one of the best personal blogs out there. So well written.

To the Manor Chosen

Now I am no big fan of "reality tv". But I do love Survivor and have watched it from the the middle of the first season. I also used to like "The Real World" on MTV. Oh and I've seen all the PBS reality shows in the past few years, "1900 House", "Frontier House" and that other one about English life during WWII, "Blitz House" or something. Well then maybe I am a fan of some reality tv but none where marriage or singing is involved.
This week's airing of "Manor House" on PBS was quite entertaining. Everyone they cast on it was perfect from the obnoxious titled family upstairs to the butler who sounded surprisingly like Mrs. Doubtfire to the chef de cuisine Monsieur Dubiard who I swear was Rowan Atkinson. The family upstairs were so full of themselves. After filming was over when they talked to the Lady of the House who in real life is an emergency room physician and she had seen how back breaking the work down stairs was all she had to say was that doctors with familes work very hard too. True, but they make more than tuppence a week.
But a really good show overall. Check it out when it airs again if you missed it.

To the Manor Chosen

Now I am no big fan of "reality tv". But I do love Survivor and have watched it from the the middle of the first season. I also used to like "The Real World" on MTV. Oh and I've seen all the PBS reality shows in the past few years, "1900 House", "Frontier House" and that other one about English life during WWII, "Blitz House" or something. Well then maybe I am a fan of some reality tv but none where marriage or singing is involved.

This week's airing of "Manor House" on PBS was quite entertaining. Everyone they cast on it was perfect from the obnoxious titled family upstairs to the butler who sounded surprisingly like Mrs. Doubtfire to the chef de cuisine Monsieur Dubiard who I swear was Rowan Atkinson. The family upstairs were so full of themselves. After filming was over when they talked to the Lady of the House who in real life is an emergency room physician and she had seen how back breaking the work down stairs was all she had to say was that doctors with familes work very hard too. True, but they make more than tuppence a week.

But a really good show overall. Check it out when it airs again if you missed it.

"I do not think it means what you think it means."

"I do not think it means what you think it means."

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means." - Inigo Montoya.

Okay, so there's this commercial for KFC that was on TV the other morning and I heard it from the other room as it played so I'm sure not all the details about it are correct. It was probably for those new boneless chicken wing things. At the end of the commercial Jason Alexander says, "See, you can have your cake and eat it too!" Maybe KFC serves cake now. Kentucky Fried Cake?

Anyways what the former Mr. Costanza meant I guess was you can have the best of both worlds. That's not what having your cake is all about though. It really is an odd expression. It's origin in English, according to the Random House Dictionary of Popular Proverbs and Sayings, is attributed to John Heywood's Proverbs (1546) stating, "Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?" This of course is more meaningful, getting the order right. Once you've eaten all your cake, you no longer have any cake left. So you can't eat your cake and have it too. But you have to have your cake first before you can eat it and that's the most confusing part of the saying. Its intended meaning is you cannot both keep something and consume it. "You can't spend a dollar and save it too" would be good modern equivalent.

But why does KFC think you can eat all your cake (or chicken) and still have some left? Was it Heraclitus or Colonel Sanders who said "you can't eat the same chicken twice" or was it "a chicken can't cross the same road twice"? I forget. But he was right. Once it's gone, it's gone. Sure there may be other cake or extra crispy chicken legs but you'll never get back the ones that went down to your belly. Maybe we confuse our abundance of resources with conservation. Or it could be an unwillingness to see across the road at the lack of chickens, not to mention cake, there. But if your going to eat cake in front of the rest of the class, make sure you brought enough for everybody.

"I do not think it means what you think it means."

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means." - Inigo Montoya.

Okay, so there's this commercial for KFC that was on TV the other morning and I heard it from the other room as it played so I'm sure not all the details about it are correct. It was probably for those new boneless chicken wing things. At the end of the commercial Jason Alexander says, "See, you can have your cake and eat it too!" Maybe KFC serves cake now. Kentucky Fried Cake?

Anyways what the former Mr. Costanza meant I guess was you can have the best of both worlds. That's not what having your cake is all about though. It really is an odd expression. It's origin in English, according to the Random House Dictionary of Popular Proverbs and Sayings, is attributed to John Heywood's Proverbs (1546) stating, "Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?" This of course is more meaningful, getting the order right. Once you've eaten all your cake, you no longer have any cake left. So you can't eat your cake and have it too. But you have to have your cake first before you can eat it and that's the most confusing part of the saying. Its intended meaning is you cannot both keep something and consume it. "You can't spend a dollar and save it too" would be good modern equivalent.

But why does KFC think you can eat all your cake (or chicken) and still have some left? Was it Heraclitus or Colonel Sanders who said "you can't eat the same chicken twice" or was it "a chicken can't cross the same road twice"? I forget. But he was right. Once it's gone, it's gone. Sure there may be other cake or extra crispy chicken legs but you'll never get back the ones that went down to your belly. Maybe we confuse our abundance of resources with conservation. Or it could be an unwillingness to see across the road at the lack of chickens, not to mention cake, there. But if your going to eat cake in front of the rest of the class, make sure you brought enough for everybody.